live, LAUGH(ter), LOVE

Betrayal

I hate how nothing is going good right now. The people I thought were close to me is just using me and only talking to me when they need me. Oh, i need a ride, i need something from you, im lonely so ill talk to you. Cut it, because im not going to bother with you guys anymore. And every time, sadly, i get my hopes up thinking that we can be friends again and hang out. And you know what? Those people are the ones saying things like how miserable their lives are and how they are silently suffering. But you know what? Then why dont you treat others right if you know how it feels to be that way. Because they arent necessarily feeling their best either. Maybe they have it worse than you. But of course you wouldnt know if the person youre using is feeling worse or better than you right? Because you hardly talk to them, and you do only when you need them for something. And if thats the case, of course they wont open up to you. So the point at hand, im tired of getting used, being talked to only when im needed. And when i need someone to talk to, youre not there. Those are only one of my concerns, but it just gets to me that some people are so selfish…and…i dont even know. Disgusted at finding out who they really are.

The Road Not Taken (by: Robert Frost)

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, 

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could 

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear; 

Though as for that, the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black. 

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Looking

I want to find out who my true friends are. Who will really be with me through whatever, and that are there for me whenever. Honestly, I can’t be MYSELF around anybody but my family, as of now. And my past experiences has me not trusting a lot of people. I’m afraid of trusting somebody, and being hurt again. Because one of the worst things that can happen to you is betrayal. Another things is that I observe a lot of people getting betrayed behind their back. And this gets on my nerves REALLY BAD. 

I want to find out what I’m made of. What I can be, if I go for all of the opportunities that come my way. Like what would have happened if I actually took the chance that was given to me of auditioning for being in the media? So the next chance I have, I’m going to. And it’s coming up real soon. I don’t care if I fail, i just want to see what it’s like. (Same with college!!) I was so afraid of failure, I didn’t try in the past. But you won’t ever really know if you would fail or not if you don’t even try it in the first place. ALL OUT BABY! From now on, I’m not going to let my fears hold me back from anything. Life is about taking chances, and if I fail, I will learn from them…

 As Pocahontas’s song says:

What I love most about rivers is:
You can’t step in the same river twice
The water’s always changing, always flowing
But people, I guess, can’t live like that
We all must pay a price
To be safe, we lose our chance of ever knowing
What’s around the riverbend
Waiting just around the riverbend

I look once more
Just around the riverbend
Beyond the shore
Where the gulls fly free
Don’t know what for
What I dream the day might send
Jut around the riverbend
For me
Coming for me

I feel it there beyond those trees
Or right behind these waterfalls
Can I ignore that sound of distant drumming
For a handsome sturdy husband
Who builds handsome sturdy walls
And never dreams that something might be coming?
Just around the riverbend
Just around the riverbend

I look once more
Just around the riverbend
Beyond the shore
Somewhere past the sea
Don’t know what for …
Why do all my dreams extend
Just around the riverbend?
Just around the riverbend …

Should I choose the smoothest curve
Steady as the beating drum?
Should I marry Kocoum?
Is all my dreaming at an end?
Or do you still wait for me, Dream Giver
Just around the riverbend?

And like her, I will decide to take the path full of risks and the unknown. I can’t stand not knowing what is on the other sideee… 

Love

I’ve heard that when you truly love someone, you try to change yourself so that the person likes you better. But is that really necessary? I want someone to love me for who I am right now, who I want to be in the future, and who I turn out to be in the end. (That’s a lot to ask for). And maybe, they can even help me build me. :) But if they are able to love you for who you are, in all those times, that is the kind of love that will last. But make sure you provide them with that luxury too…
When you really really love someone, it seems as if they look better everyday. Literally. Its crazy. One day, you think they are the best looking guy/girl in the world. And then they just keep looking better and better every time you see them. You know how they say whenever you fall in love, everything else just falls aside, and nothing else that happens around you matters anymore? Well, maybe its just that that’s happening, and your love for them is making you feel like they keep looking better and better. Or maybe, they are trying harder to look better for you…you never really know exactly what’s happening in life…
But what I know as a fact: If you love somebody, tell them. Let then know your feelings for them. Because you never know when you will lose them in your life. Whether it be that they are taken by another girl/guy, or you literally lose them. It may be today, tomorrow, or a couple days, months, or years later. But if you don’t tell them, you’ll regret it. You keep thinking, maybe I had a chance with him/her? Maybe, just maybe, they liked you back a little too, and a relationship with them was worth a try. But if you don’t take action, nothing starts. Things change everyday, even people’s feelings for others. So go for it. If you like someone, tell them. I sure as hell regret not telling the one I loved that I love him as much as I could have….assuming that he would know, when all he might have wanted to hear was that you love him. And I did, and other people knew because of how I talked about him to them. But i guess he wanted me to tell him directly…so yeah. communication is key - for no regrets later on.   :)    

Princess Steal! :p

Cinderella:

[ ] One of your parents is dead

[ ] You are expected to do a lot of chores

[ ] You love to dress up

[x] You love animals

[x] You are waiting patiently for your Prince Charming

[x] Your mom is really strict

[ ] You have sisters who seem kind of jealous of you

[x] You’re afraid to speak your mind sometimes

[x] You have left your shoes at a friend’s house before

[ ] You have blonde hair

TOTAL: 5

Belle:

[x] You’ve kissed someone your friends didn’t like

[ ] You’ve been lost in the forest

[xxxxxxxxxxxx] You love to read

[ ] You are not shy at all, and not afraid to speak your mind

[x] One of your family members is a bit weird

[x] You have done volunteer work

[ ] You have a wild imagination

[x] You love to take care of people in need

[x] You’ve had guys like you only because they think you’re pretty

[x] You’ve rejected at least one person when they’ve asked you out

TOTAL: 7

Jasmine:

[ ] Your dad is very rich/important 

[ ] You are very clever 

[x] You’ve been with someone way different from you

[x] You’re unique and different from everyone else

[x] You’d never marry someone just because they were rich 

[x] You have set a lot of goals for yourself

[x] You don’t have a lot of friends

[x ] You’re independent

[ ] You are wealthy

[x] Your parents try to control your life

TOTAL: 7

Ariel

[x] Your parents expect a lot from you

[ ] You really try to follow the rules, but it’s hard for you

[ ] You’re a bit of a trouble maker

[x] You’re the youngest in your family or in the last 2

[ ] You have a lot of sisters (3 or more)

[ ] You collect something

[x] You have/had long, hair

[x] You have/had a pet fish

[x] You’re extremely curious

[x] You believe everything people tell you/you’re a bit gullible

TOTAL: 6

Snow White:

[ ] You know that you’re beautiful 

[ ] Sometimes it seems like your mom is jealous of you

[ ] You’ve almost been killed

[ ] You have at least seven good friends

[ ] You’ve had food poisoning

[x] You have/had short hair

[ ] You get along with almost everyone

[ ] All of your friends are different

[x]You love to have a good time

[x]You’re happier when you’re out of the house than in

TOTAL: 3

Mulan:

[x] You can be a tomboy sometimes.

[x] People wish you could be a bit more girly

[x] You’ve pretended to be someone you’re not

[x] You’ve had a physical fight with someone

[x] You have/had considered running away from home

[x] Your parents try to plan your life out

[x] A lot of your friends are boys

[x] You often find yourself in bad situations

[x] You feel like the world’s against you.

[x] Your principles are more important to you than anything else.

TOTAL: perfect match…   -_-

Aurora:

[ ] You live/have lived with someone other than your parents

[ ] You almost died at a very young age

[ ] You are gentle, loving, and/or thoughtful

[ ] You have a decent singing voice

[ ] You like to sleep in late on the weekends

[ ] You spend most of your time outside

[ ] You’re adopted

[x] You’re very romantic

[xxxxxx] Pink is one of your favorite colors

[ ] You constantly sleep in.

TOTAL: 2

Pocahontas:

[x] You love to walk around and explore big cities

[x] You are more spiritual than religious

[does japanese and korean count?] You’ve been in an interracial relationship

[ ] One of your family members is dead 

[x] Your parents are/were very protective of you

[ ] Someone you know has been in war

[x] You love nature

[x] You have/had black hair

[x] You would love to move somewhere exotic and beautiful

[x] You’re very adventurous

TOTAL: 7/8

Rapunzel:

[ ] You’re an orphaned child or have an evil step-mother

[x] You have many different hobbies to keep you busy

[x] You can get really bored

[ ] You have very long hair

[ ] Your hair is bright Blonde

[ ] You’re an artsy person

[x] You’re childish

[x] You can’t wait to stop the same routine each day and start living. Yet the thought of leaving is scary. 

[x] You care about others and their feelings

[x] You like to follow the rules. Sometimes you cannot for your own good and then you feel conflicted and worry about how your mother will react.

Total: 5

Totally Mulan…something to do with the asian lifestyle? lol.